'Tis the season.

Another Thanksgiving has come and passed, aye?! I definitely had a good time. I ate so much food, I didn't hardly have to eat today!! Thanksgiving is the time of year (but shouldn't be the ONLY time) to be thankful for what we all have! (and don't have!) I am most definitely thankful for my amazing family. They hold me together when I'm barely hanging by a thread. I am also thankful for my few friends who are, of course, my other halves. Withouth these people, life wouldn't be as enjoyable!

December is almost here, and I cannot believe Christmas is taunting my door yet again! I LOVE the holiday season and it's great to be alive for yet another year. We must remember, not a day is promised to us! We sometimes see Christmas and the holiday season as a must, but many families are torn apart from lost loved ones! Always cherish the present (and not present like gift!), because we might not be around for the next one! I am so ready for the Christmas tree to go up! I have my small one in my quarters of the house, but the big one is always so much better! The beautiful lights, sparkling ornaments, delicious food, sweet candy canes, and the weather--is to die for! Here in Louisiana, this is the only cold spurt we ever get! I've only seen snow once in my entire life, which was last year. Maybe I'll get lucky and we'll get a snow fall in December or January! After those two months, it's pretty much back to the muggy and hot days for us. Many people are sick right now, but it's not due to the cold! It's due to the fact that one day it's cold and the next day it's hot! To be a resident of LA you really need a good immune system! One day you need a coat, boots, and gloves, then the next it's tank tops, flip flops and shorts! It's really a headache.

I've made some pretty big decisions since my last couple of posts. The relationship I was working on is a lost cause at this point. I have tried and tried and tried, yet still no improvement. I was talking with my father earlier and he agrees. This guy is a loser! He has been out of high school for over four years and still has no trade, no job, no education, NOTHING! I really can't lower my standards for someone who isn't trying to help himself. I have helped him and helped him, but still nothing for my benefit. Really, n o t h i n g. So, I'm done. Single again, and happy about my decision. Over the past three years I've had three serious relationships. One was worth every ounce of fighting for, but the others are hopeless. I haven't really decided what I'm going to do except just let it ride. When I'm least expecting, Mr. Right will show up! Patience is a virtue...

I stopped taking my medicine, again! I know, I know... I said I was going to take it! I just, can't. I don't know what the issue is. I'm so independent I think I need no help? Not sure, but I'll be working on it, I guess. I've been having alot of confusing dreams lately. I've dreamed of him every night for almost two weeks. I think it's because the holidays....but no...I do it when it isn't the holidays. I still don't know why I can't let go! It's been OVER A YEAR! When am I going to suffice from this misery!!!!? Only time will tell I guess. But, before it used to bother me when I thought of him. Now, it's "normal" and I actually look forward to it almost. I guess it's a coping mechanism I am still going through...

I'm ready to go back to school for the spring semester in January. I've been looking forward to it, actually. People are like, are you crazy?? No, I'm just ready to get my career going! The sooner I finish college, the better in my eyes. I always watch alot of TruTV and I've been really contemplating which field in Criminal Justice I want to go into. I was thinking, you know, straight law enforcement, but I haven't decided entirely just yet. We shall see where God puts his hand on this matter!!

There is a song by John Mayer called "Who Says" and I'd like to post some lyrics:

Who says I can't get stoned
Turn off the lights and the telephone
Me in my house alone
Who says I can't get stoned

Who says I can't be free
From all the things that I used to be
Rewrite my history
Who says I can't be free

It's been a long night in New York City
It's been a long night in Baton Rouge
I don't remember you looking any better
But then again I don't remember you

This song really makes me think. The representation of it is almost as if, "who really should care what I do with my life?" It also brings sign of changing the past to make a better present, which is impossible, but makes you think about your present more in order to be able to say you have a good past. I really love John Mayer's writing and perfomance. He is a very talented writer and musician! If you aren't aware of all his works check them out! Some great ones to download by him are the following songs: Bigger than my body, Clarity, Half of my heart, Your body is a wonderland, and Who Says. He's a great contemporary artist who's music is just plain soothing! I think every post or so, I'll write a little about an artist/song I think is good and explain the meaning out a bit. Music expresses which cannot be said!

Have a great holiday season everyone! Until next time!