Oh glory.




As they say, life goes on. Life for me is slowly going on, I would presume, as I am still sitting here. Alas, I am still sitting here wondering how and why the things in my life have happened to me. Why me? Why must I have to deal with heartbreak, loss, suffering, pain. I actually might have somewhat of an answer to that...because it's a part of life. Life gives many things to us. It offers many opportunities for advancement, and willingly makes us happy at times. But nothing is just a give situation. Life gives and takes. Life took something I treasured away from me, love.

I want the sunshine to pick me up, and wrap me around about in it's magnifying glory. Wisp me into infinite subliminal dimensions. I want something to be my sunshine...someone? Maybe not someone, as humans are so unpredictable. Humans are so very unpredictable. As each of us holds our own mind, and none of us are mind readers, we cannot predict what another is contemplating, therefore we cannot prepare ourselves for what is to come because of that thought from the other we cannot see.

There is so much on my mind at the moment. I don't, honestly, have time for a relationship with someone.  How bad I want to feel love again, and experience happiness with someone, I cannot bear the pain it brings, when it will inevitably fail, because all good things come to an end. I get my hopes up sometimes thinking he will call me one day and just say, "darling, it's going to be ok..." but then I open my eyes and realize I fell asleep and that was merely a dream and that will never happen. I lost what I had...I just can't bring myself to cut the loss and move on. I mean, I have somewhat, but love is so detailed, so abrasive so, detachable.

Maybe by the glory of God Almighty, I will be granted happiness again, and maybe a new life. A life I can create... but until then, I'll make the best of what I do hold in my possession.



Comments

Anonymous said…
Hi there how are you? I was looking through your blog and found it interesting and wanted to leave you a comment.

I have an ivitation for you to come and visit my art blog here in San Diego, and comment if you will.

I think that you may enjoy the various labels and music videos I design for my art blog, hope to see you here soon and take care :)
November 9, 2008 at 2:25 PM
jiggins said…
I wouldn't say none of us are mind-readers. I venture to guess that you are pretty good at knowing what others are thinking.. or feeling - even if you haven't learned to trust that voice.

Life is a wonderland indeed. It's just up to you to have a good time and maybe learn something along the way. We're all in it together ;)
November 26, 2008 at 2:01 AM
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